twilight South Sydney
as the yellow sun disappears over the suburban rooftops
in this lowrise city
after the habitual afternoon nap
and before my sister gets back from work
and the house then livens
to family meal and TV
to fish and cookies
and the concerns of the student teenager
to ritual fruit
followed by ritual chocolate
for i have entered family world
after months of nomadism
and green-terraced hillsides
in India and Nepal
and before more months of wandering
in Indonesian Borneo
Eastern Kalimantan?
and possibly Sulawesi
and then my long-term ambition
the mountains North of Hanoi
for hikes and terraced perches
while this family world is very pleasant
and very functioning
so i’m having a good look at a family
at family-ness
with a longstanding couple
sister Alice and husband Ryan
whose wedding i was last here for
twenty-six years ago
and they have two grown-up children
who have grown up tall
and good-looking
and funny
and easy bright and breezy
and grown up enough to be an
Army Helicopter pilot, Jackson
which is pretty serious
and the result of very serious commitment
where the other is newly a student of
Forensic Criminology, Lily
which also sounds pretty serious
and where all four in this family seem like
well-adjusted human beings
which, after months and months in my own head
and after the stoners of foreigner Nepal
and foreigner India
with their burnouts
and their sardonics
and their slow’n’spacy
and their accumulation of encrusting idiosyncrasies
and after the odd, other family
with their dysfunctions
well, after all that
the Ryans, Alison’s family
seem bright
and shiny
and happy
and achieving
and uncomplicated
and an advert for
well
an advert for normal
the kind of normal i have never even thought
of attempting
to achieve
so its all an
unexpected
eye-opener
for a life not lived
a road not taken
...
...
...
so
do i know anyone in Kalimantan?
…
anyone been up the Mahakam River?
...
had never heard of it until 4 p m Thursday
and now its going to occupy the next bunch of weeks
boat after boat up into jungle
until the river becomes impassable
or i find a lovely village
in jungle or on river
...
so i fly to Balikpapan
and then head for Samarinda
which does sound nice
yet googlemaps
[see image]
says its surrounded by severe fires
though that’s one less fire than yesterday
to the north-west
...
and then its the Mahakam
...
...
...
in other news
the photo at the top...
never used the word “mizzle” before
where it now seems an excellent word
with drizzle dismal and miserable
all in the mix
...
“the dismal mizzle
and the miserable drizzle”
for instance
...
...
…
…
in other news
Chatswood, North Sydney
acutely cuteless
...
the aesthetic of the concrete shopping parade
gets big ideas
runs riot
runs big
and starts to believe in proper scale
...
“acute”, a new word
like “amoral” means moral doesn’t come into it
cute certainly doesn’t come into Chatswood
so its... acute
...
...
...
...
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in other news
though i thought about it for weeks
i didn’t actually do anything about it
…
…